10/50 = too many

this morning i went out with the water&sanitation team to a sanitation training. the training is for members of a village in which we recently rehabilitated a well and teaches the importance of hand washing, etc. to avoid fecal-oral diseases such as cholera.

before the training started, we had the chance to speak to headmaster emmanuel of the secondary school which was allowing us the space for training. for the sake of conservation, i asked him how long he'd been headmaster, how many students he had, how many went on to college, etc. this year is his 10th, there are 300 students across the 4 grades, and about 3-5 go on to college every year, he responded. emmanuel went on to disclose his school's problem: young pregnancies. this school year alone, 10/50 first year girls have dropped out due to pregnancies.

10 out of 50.

i stared at him with a dropped jaw and felt shocked, sad and mad all at the same time. i was shocked that this statistic was so large, sad that these girls would never be able to see their dreams come true, mad that they didn't make better decisions for themselves. i looked into the faces of the girls around me and couldn't help but wonder which face would soon disappear from the school due to pregnancy. "they don't value their education" he explained.

endless questions overflowed my brain's capacity: what do these girls dream of? what will it take to decrease these numbers? why does this happen? and most haunting "what should i do? what can i do?"

so i offered to talk to the girls and lead a workshop for them. on what? i have no idea. maybe on leadership, decision-making, realizing dreams.

any advice is most welcome and needed (HE).

_____________________________________
and some fun stuff:
great great weekend (:

friday night; watched jack&the beanstalk at the international school, babysat for the eggerts, watched madagascar(go africa!), and stayed up talking to kathleen until 1am - weee party animals.

saturday: zomba market and bargained (YES, me, bargaining) 3 chitenges for 1500MK, went to thomas' 5th birthday extravaganza, and a bbq/meetup across the road that was full of masters'/phd students researching for the world bank

sunday: went to church in blantyre, split a boneless chicken lunch with kathleen since my order was missed, then no longer available, played volleyball(YES, me, volleyball!) with local volunteers, went to the local hangout to watch the confederations cup final (where this malawian man kept chanting "O-BA-MA O-BA-MA")

discussing ways that fecal waste can make its way to your mouth

paying attention in training, realizing the importance of hand washing

kathleen and i found a baby boy with asian eyes to bring home (:

im hungry.

my first full week in malawi involved 4 hosted dinners in a row, a chichewa lesson, liwonde prayer day, and 2 days out in the field.

on wednesday, i went out with the world food programme(wfp) staff to do food distributions. wfp has a FoodforWork pilot wherein beneficiaries work certain tasks and are paid with food. i asked kathleen what she usually does for lunch when she's out in the field and she said "oh, well we don't really eat lunch when we're in the field". oh...ok. i brought a kitkat bar along with me "just in case".

by 11am, we were at our 2nd distribution centre and the men had to pick up more food from the warehouse. i stayed at the school with another woman. the younger children were already done school and sat in front of me staring. after my failed attempts in conversing in english and chichewa, i decided to organize a game: boys catch girls. this took 15min. for the next 2h, we played any game i could recall from my childhood. 2h later the men return and we proceed with the distributions. by this time, i was feeling a bit lightheaded thanks to the hot village sun - what a change from the mountains. i take a sip of water and feel slightly better. the lightheadedness continued and mixed in with feeling faint. i continued to find comfort in water. i felt like throwing up but had nothing to throw up. at 630pm (almost 12h since breakfast), i finally sit down for a meal.

yes, maybe i was being a bit dramatic but eating 2 meals a day is not the norm for me. yes, i could have eaten the kitkat, but it wasnt something i'd be able to share with my 3 coworkers. no, i was not going to faint, so i just sucked it up. if my coworkers are not eating, i didn't feel that i needed to either. this is culture and i didn't want to be a weak little canadian girl.

the reality is, hunger and poverty is real. it's rampant. and this experience was a lesson in humility and simplicity. i'm learning to be sincere in giving thanks for food rather than just saying the words. most malawians can only afford to eat 1-2 meals a day. most times, the meals are the same: nsima, vegetables, and sometimes a bit of meat. one coworker was asked by a malawian "i heard in canada, you eat something different for 3 days". all she could do was smile and brush it off because in canada, it's very easy to eat something different everyday for a month.

so there you have it. the girl that loves food went struggled through 12h without eating (:

world food programme projects

water & sanitation projects

time, please slow down.

whether you're someone with high expectations or low expectations, the fact is that you will always have some expectations or idea in your mind of how something will be or feel. over the next 2 months, i expect to learn about international development, malawian/african culture, myself, God, and my purpose in life. and so, i've had some interesting learning experiences over the past 8 days:

1. malawi has mountains EVERYWHERE. mountains and valleys and trees and stars. this is a beautiful country.
2. there are always people walking on the side of the roads. where to? wherever their heart desires.
3. when offered nsima (flour-y porridge, malawian equivalent of rice), it is BURNING hot. do not try to grab it slowly with your whole hand. wet your fingertips beforehand taking it.
4. i am chinese, or assumed to be so. asian girl = china girl ;p maybe it's my bangs
5. children in the villages are shy but absolutely love to have their photo taken. they have kung fu poses.
   
6. mefloquine (my anti-malarial) will cause me to burn easily, and make my tan fade quicker (no black beauty this summer)
7. my chichewa rocks: muli bwanji. ndili bwino, kaya inu? mukupita kuti? ndzina langu kristina.
8. i'm weak. malawian women carry 15kg on their heads like it's nothing. i tried lifting with one arm and failed.
9. food is priced about equal to canadian food. imported food is crazy overpriced, cheerios=$30CDN.
10. the power goes out at least once a day for stretches of 1-3h, and usually during dinner time.
11. Being out at 11pm is a late night. I sleep at 1030pm, wake up at 6am, start work by 715am.
    

for the sake of a short post, i shall leave it at that. and of course some pictures:

victor, the papaya climber and me, the climbing failure

beautiful lake malawi (:

kathleen and i (:

battlefields

oftentimes, aid workers and missions volunteers fit more or less to certain criteria: well-travelled, minimalistic, outdoors-y, big-hearted, and vocal about their passions. admittedly, i fit few if any of those criteria. i've been told "you're not exactly low-maintenance" and "i never imagined you'd want to go on missions", which makes me laugh ;p not because it's not true, but why does there need to be preconceived qualities of an aid worker or of someone wanting to go on missions?

lately i've been questioning more and more of what my place or where my calling is in this diverse world. if i had a say, i'd be an international food taster/blogger. i think i'd be quite good at that (: but really, if i had a say, it would be a position which involves alot of travelling and eating.

lately i've been learning more and more that it matters less what i want and more what God wants, more what there is a need for. i've been questioning how i can use my technical skills for change and have crossing my fingers that the answer will be one in which i can work directly with international development (travelling included!). in recent conversations, i've been told

"maybe the corporate field is your mission field. that it's not bad to make money because initiatives need to be supported somehow. if you can get a good job that pays you well, take it! because there are many people who need your support"

part of me says "Yes!" the corporate world is my battlefield. i could mitigate change amongst the for-profit sector. i could encourage people to be stewards of their money. how many ways have i complained that the corporate sector cares too much about themselves and money and too little about injustice? maybe my place is in the corporate world. but another part of me says "No..." i want to work with people. i want to be amongst the poorest of the poor and be there when they have their first taste of clean water.

so God, i'll wait for Your verdict, otherwise, i'll fail.

Therefore, in the present case I advise you: Leave these men alone! Let them go! For if their purpose or activity is of human origin, it will fail. But if it is from God, you will not be able to stop these men; you will only find yourselves fighting against God.

acts 5:38-39

entering phase 2

and the honeymoon phase is over.
i miss home =(

theorize and apply

when i first read that malawi is 80% christian (55% protestant, 25% catholic), i was impressed and thanked God that the people here not only know who He is, but also believe in Him. i thought this demographic would be a plus in my work.

we had a cultural orientation session with a young pastor's wife and she told us

"christianity in africa is like a very very wide lake...that's only 1 inch deep"

she continued in telling us that numbers are merely numbers and i heard firsthand her accounts that handouts and aid are not enough. victory told us how missionaries came to malawi with arms filled of things to give away and how when asked to receive Christ into their lives, people routinely raised their hands without commitment or knowing what they were doing. numbers are just numbers, used to fund projects and show concrete figures that work is being done and money is well-spent. i am slowly beginning to match faces and names to theories of development and aid. no longer is dead aid a book, but the story of a friend and of many around me.

the first dinner i was here, a newly ordained malawian pastor said grace and prayed

"Lord, bless those that do not have any food to eat today"

this prayer was sincere and so real, so much more meaningful than how i pray for the hungry.

reality and malawi is making real of the all the theories and stories i've been reading.

i live on a mountain

molly and the mountains. this dog is bigger than me :O

zomba market

zomba market; they re-use tin and make it shiny and usable

Mulibwanji!

after 34h (including a 7h flight to london, 12h layover in london, 11h flight to johannesburg, 3h wait, 3h flight), i have finally arrived in Malawi. Thanks to everyone for your support and prayers in getting me here =)

Disclaimer: Please excuse any spelling, grammar or logic mistakes in this post. I am lacking sleep.

Malawi is very mountainous! Much more so than I ever imagined. Mountains all around, and I'm determined to climb some. Kathleen and I already gave word to Paul that we'd like to climb Mt. Mulanji (just less than 10 000 ft) in July. The Zomba plateau is about 7000, so we can practice with that anytime we want.

When we arrived in Blantyre, I stepped off the plane, only to look up and see a 50m balcony completely filled with people cheering and waving to their friends and family arriving on the plane. It was quite a sight and made me smile =) I looked up to look for Kathleen, Paul and Helen, but failed. So instead, I took a 360 degree look around me and marvelled that I made it. I passed immigration and was immediately greeted by Paul in the baggage claim area. How did he get there? He has connections ;p I found my luggage and we were off with Kathleen for some lunch and grocery shopping (where we definitely tried to leave from the entrance).

I exchanged $200USD ($1USD=172 Kwacha), and the largest bill is 500 Kwacha, meaning I had a big wad of money. Cereal is expensive! I think 800 Kwacha for a smaller-than-regular box, and books are REALLY expensive: 9000!

When I was landing in Joburg, I thought "I'm in South Africa...AFRICA?! I'm in Africa!" I had a beautiful sunrise flight in where we were soaring above the clouds. In the distance, I could see the soft red soft rising. It colouring the land below, but also peaked through the low clouds above. Beautiful =) I'm a sucker for sunrises.

I'm here, I'm here. I can't wait to get started and let God work through me, use me, break me, and make me into the person He desires =)

June 15: Thanks Oates family for the plane ride books!
June 16: Thanks Pastor Kevin for the card. I was definitely tired when I read it, and it was a great encouragement =)

and some photos for those that don't like to read:

wee world traveller (:

buckingham palace; im a loner =(

palace after the changing of the guards

big ben IS quite big

EYE am in london

change: embrace it.

for my 21st birthday, my waterloves got me this beautiful jeanine payer necklace :D

change and i didn't always have a history of wonderful tales. we didn't always get along. the first semester of high school, the first term of university, first weeks at work, all extremely exciting times, but always mildly to overly difficult for me.

one of the most important lessons waterloo has taught me is to embrace change. in a program that required slight to extreme change every 4 months, i've learned to look forward to new chapters in life and to go at them full swing, knowing that amidst all the changes going on around me, the people and ideals i value will never change. i can almost say that i've become a change lover. i expect change and now love new surroundings, new houses, new roommates, new food, new climates, new everything. change and i have become good friends now, because change, they say, is the one of the only true constants in life.

but somehow, this time feels a bit different. for once, i'll go away and have no idea what will change, stay the same, or remain when i return. for once, i'll leave and not know how i'll change, what parts of me will be the same, or what part of me will remain when i return. this is what i fear the most: that the things i didn't want to change will, that things i wanted to stay the same won't, and that the things that remain won't be enough. i fear that the old will no longer be compatible with the new, and the new will be something i didn't want.

somehow it's not leaving that i fear, it's returning.

if i....

had money to spare and no heart for what i'm doing, i'd deck myself out in the cutest humanitarian gear:

1. THE sash
2. a little shuffle
3. ray bans
4. a maxi dress
5. travel pillow
6. one-piece bathing suit
7. lulu hat
8. a cute little sony p series
9. flip flops
10. soft leather purse

;p
just saying.

heaven on earth

i had the privilege of seeing hillsong united this past saturday (as I do every year). and as every year, they put on an amazing show and had 15 000 people singing, dancing, and worshiping with them.

phil dooley was replaced this year with someone from the hillsong college. he talked about how although heaven and earth are 2 separate places, sometimes it's possible to catch glimpses of heaven on earth. at the times when the naked are clothed, the hungry are fed, and the thirsty are given a drink, heaven is brought to earth.

as a Christian, i have the opportunity to bring heaven to earth. through me, God can show His glory and love. i think that's amazingly powerful. i, in all my failures and shortcomings, can provide glimpses of heaven's glory on earth.

13 Facts about Malawi

why 13? because i'm leaving in 13 days.

13. One Canadian Dollar = 134 Malawian Kwacha
12. The national languages are English, and Chichewa
11. It is nicknamed "the warm heart of Africa" due to it's friendly people
10. It is among the world's 10 poorest nations, with GNI per capita is $596USD
9. Canada recently removed Malawi from it's "aid priority" list
8. Dominant religions are: 55% Protestant, 20% Catholic, 20% Muslim
7. President Bingu wa Mutharika was recently re-elected for a second term with "fighting corruption" as a priority
6. Lake Malawi is listed as a UNESCO World Heritage Site due to the endemic fish showing specialized evolution
5. Almost 90% of Malawians live in rural areas
4. Maize(corn) is the staple food
3. Average birth rate per woman is 5.9 children
2. 14% of the population is infected with HIV/AIDS
1. The Blackberry is now available in Malawi

Oh man 13 days.